Holy blogosphere, it has been a while. I’ve neglected writing for some time, and I don’t really have any good excuses except that I’ve been a little less dogmatic about health and nutrition than I have been for a few years now. I’m not saying that I’ve gone off the rails and completely abandoned everything I’ve learned; instead, I’ve come to realize that this really has become a way of life, a lifestyle, and I find myself needed less accountability to stick to things than I perhaps needed before (even if said accountability was the abyss that is the interwebs of blogging).
If you’ll recall, this last winter I really struggled staying on the wagon and really felt I had abandoned all primal and paleo principles, felt like I was gaining weight, and didn’t feel like I was making any significant gains. I suspect some of those feelings were due to winter blues, but I also believe chronic obsession with being “healthy” turned into a negative thing for me. I got tunnel vision, and I wasn’t looking at the big picture. I was weighing myself too often (sometimes multiple times a day) and being way to analytical about every morsel of food that went in my mouth. I saw the scale bounce around, slowly saw my 187 creep back up to 202, and I freaked out. I thought I was failing. And, technically, I was—just not in the way I thought I was.
The Whole30 really brought me back. And not because I am adhering to those rules all of the time, but because it got me back in the mindset of “be healthy” instead of “lose weight.” And, I’ll tell you what, I like myself a lot more when I’m in that state. It’s less stressful, there’s no pressure, and I do things because I truly enjoy them. I cook good food because I like to. I like the way the food nourishes my body and the way it makes me feel. I work out because I see definition in my arms and I feel strong and athletic when I play sports.
But, I also have a few beers when I play softball. I go out for pizza every once in a while. I’ll enjoy a meal out and not worry about being 100% primal. I know these things aren’t healthy, but I’m not going to agonize over it right now if I can maintain my strength, weight, and health when I’m 80% primal. To me, that’s a positive change—a change that says yes, this is my lifestyle. Not just some fad, not just some temporary change to get to some end result. This is the way I choose to eat, most of the time, to make myself healthier.
The number on the scale might not reflect positive change all the time, but I can see a definite difference in the way my clothes fit. My body composition is changing, for the better, and I love that. For now, it’s summer, and I’m going to enjoy it and have fun, go camping and play softball and not stress out over food, because I know when I have the options of being primal, I will take them 90% of the time. Maybe this fall and winter I’ll get strict for a month or three to see what I can do; but at the moment I’m happy living in the present and practicing all principles of the primal blueprint to lead a happy, healthy, and full life.